The Cost of Being a Man

As the saying goes (if you say it fast and kind of mumble), it takes money to make manly.  Though many challenges were free of charge, my pursuit of masculinity required more than time and effort.  I’ve decided to list my expenses for fifty weeks of challenges should any current man-children want to follow my lead.

Bowtie $24.99
Safety Razor $30.00
Shaving Class $40.00
3 Glasses of Scotch $50.00
50 Bullets $15.99
NRA Range Fees for 1 Hour $20.00
Corn Cob Pipe $9.99
2 Ounces of Tobacco $20.60
Two Piece Suit $150.00
2 Raw Eggs $0.83
Bull Penis $6.00
Plate of Peppers $2.99
Stuntman Class $60.00
3 Krav Maga Classes $90.00
Groin Protector $12.00
Gambling Money $300.00
1 Ounce of Custom Made Cologne $42.00
Meat and Veggies for Grilling $20.00
Porterhouse for Two $96.50
Wood for Guitar Pedal Board $4.00
10-Day Fishing License for North Carolina $10.00
Bait $10.00
First Fishing Set $19.96
Entry Fee for Survival Race $79.00
Tickets for Coney Island Carnival Games $24.00
2 Samurai Sword Classes $29.99
Welding Rods $10.99
Watercolor Set $2.89
Haircut $18.00
Motorcycle Class $90.00
12-lb. Shot Put $29.00
Horse Riding Class for 30 Minutes $58.85
Virginia Polar Dip Entry Fee $25.00
Compass $6.99
Lock Picking Class $65.00
Drain Auger $9.99
Bleach $3.50
Football and Kicking Tee $15.39
Knife Skills Class $65.00
Sewing Kit $14.99
10 lb. Bag of Flour $4.68
TOTAL $1,589.11

And that’s not even counting the road trip.  To be fair, some of these items were donated to the project by my absurdly generous MANtors, so I can’t say that it all came out of my pocket.  But had I initially known what my total investment would be, I’d probably have opted for a testosterone injection instead.